The school mum catwalk in the age of the “super-mum”.

It’s a thing, I know it is, the school mum catwalk.  Well, it’s not really a thing but it is maybe kind of, a minor thing. Sort of, maybe a little bit. I dunno, but I get the feeling it is. Hear me out.

Mamma’s, put your hand up if you feel that pressure, that need to conform, out perform, do better, do more, say more, act smarter, be more, as a mamma at the school gate, on the sports ground, in the mall, at the cafe, at work, on your Instagram and Facebook feeds?  If you haven’t got your hand up, then big props to you, I love that you own your confidence and don’t bend to pressure.  But sometimes mammas, it’s hard right?

But I get that there is a need to please in mammas and we aren’t always kind to ourselves and sometimes, just a little bit, not kind to others. This blog started out being about what to wear on the school drop off.  It was a tongue in cheek look at the working mum and the SAHM (that’s stay at home mum) catwalk that presents itself every morning at my school. There isn’t really one, but it’s amusing to think there could be.  I’ve even had a few remarks on my strut into the school.  I swear I don’t strut, but there’s something about wearing heels that makes me “stride”, for sure. But I’m digressing.  I wanted to share my thoughts on why the motherhood sisterhood need to keep being awesome and working together, because the tribe of mothers I know are freaking awesome and beautiful and helpful and always ready to lend a hand.  Working/non working, it don’t matter.  There is no competition.  Except, I think maybe there is.

There is a competition within us and we only feel validated by hearing that others are in the same boat.  For me, well I constantly press like and share on the “scary mommy” posts I follow on Facebook.  I love Constance Hall and I dig a Kiwi writer call Emily Writes, because they all speak from the heart and talk of the ridiculousness and hardship and joy of motherhood.  I like that.  I like feel a part of a bigger community, that we are all in the trenches together and it sucks sometimes, it’s joyful more than sometimes and we’re in it for the long-haul.

It’s like when you have your first baby and you realise that you’ve just joined the biggest club in the world and the entry fee was a baby.  My world just opened up and aaaaaaalllll the mothering-ness came at me like a spider monkey.  My best friend and I laughingly started a cake competition on ourselves, without really knowing it, trying to out do our own cakes (not each others), year on year.  We lovingly supported each other at every party, with a “what a great cake” shout out as the candles got spat on, knowing we had been up until midnight the night before, icing and decorating that sucker, now that’s #solidarity.

But it’s like that with style and why I started Sisterhood.  I wanted to make other women feel as good about their own confidence in style as I did about the motherhood sisterhood that wrapped itself around me after the birth of the kids and when we joined the school community.

What I’m trying to say is, while there maybe a small faction of women that play in the muddy sandpit of spite, the sisterhood I am privileged to know, are freaking awesome women who lend a hand when needed and when it’s not asked for, get shit done and are completely awesome, they also rock a mean style game.  Whether that be in trainers and active wear or a kick arse power dress. Boom, mothers rock.

Have you got an awesome sisterhood of the motherhood story to share?  I’d love to hear it.

Mmmmwah, EJ, Mother Superior to the Sisterhood of Style xoxo

 

 

 

What she said. A client tells all…

Sisters, if you ever wanted to know what a shopping session with me was like, look no further.  My gorgeous client has written me the most incredible testimonial.  I reckon it’s that spot on, that full of emotion, that honest account of a shopping sesh with me and the precise embodiment of why I set up Sisterhood of Style, that I felt it was worthy of a blog post.

From Katie, Mother of 2, 40 years gorgeous:

I’ve been trying to come up with the best way to communicate my thoughts about how our shopping session went. I think the best thing to do is to write a blog post – but I don’t have a blog to post it to! But you do…

Sooooo, I just turned 40. And if that wasn’t enough to deal with, I have 2 young kids (aged 1 and 3). I work 4 days a week in a corporate job. I’m no longer a toned size 10 (understatement of the century). I haven’t bought clothes for myself for years – unless they are either pregnancy oriented or ill-fitting snap purchases from cheap online websites so I can kid myself that it doesn’t matter if they don’t fit. I don’t really know my size any more. I’m still wearing maternity bras even though I stopped breast feeding 6 months ago (we moved house – actually country – and I still haven’t unpacked everything properly). They are way to big and baggy on me – just one of many indicators of how little attention I’ve given my appearance recently. I haven’t lived in NZ for 13 years so I am out of touch with NZ fashion and high street shops. I have lost all interest in fashion because nothing ever fits me (5 years ago I was self proclaimed (!) reigning Queen of London high street shops). Somehow, I’ve managed to lose all confidence in my own ability to look and feel stylish. And, I don’t have the time (or confidence) to tackle the shops on my own, only to walk away with expensive clothes that don’t really fit me.

So, for my 40th birthday, I decided I needed some help to get me feeling good about clothes and my appearance again. This Mother of Style, was EXACTLY what I needed. In our 2 hours together we managed not only to find me quite a few great outfits that I feel good in, but a little bit of confidence in my body, and in my ability to shop was restored.

Thanks EJ for taking the time to think about my wants and needs and for getting to the bottom of what was holding me back. Thanks for running round after me while I tried on clothes that were the wrong size or not quite right for what ever reason. Thanks for your patience and understanding and helping me to understand why I was unsure about something. Rather than me losing confidence in my ability to shop, you re-affirmed my gut feel about an item, by articulating uncertainty I was feeling, embracing it when warranted or gently challenging me to be bold. Thanks for the compliments when we found something that looked and felt great.

Thanks for keeping me in budget! In our 2 hour session, even though I came away with quite a few bags of clothes I love, funnily enough, I left a bit of baggage behind! And, the maternity bras are gone… for good! Its onwards and upwards from here. 

xxx

Thank you so much Katies for sharing your story, it made my heart sing and I felt so happy for you that you found yourself a little bit through our session.  Love your work. Mmmmwah, EJ, the Mother of the Sisterhood xo

If you’d like to get in touch to book your own shopping session, drop me an email emma@sisterhoodofstyle.com or dm me on social media @sisterhoodofstylenz

What to wear on your first day of work

I’m starting a new job on Monday.  I’ll be the new kid on the block, at 42, that’s no mean feat.  I’ll be making friendly chit-chat and skulk out on my own at lunchtime.  I’ll have to ask where the loo is, how to make the coffee, what the kitchen etiquette is and how soon can I bring in my dog.  Yes sisters, you heard it here first, it’s a dog friendly workplace. Winning.

But I know that all of that will be a whisper in the wind by the end of the week, once I’ve worked with these awesome new people for a few days and I get the hang of the place.

What I am becoming super preoccupied with though, is what the hell do I wear?  It’s not a corporate, but I’ll be working with corporate clients, it’s not a big company, but I’ll be working with big companies.  It’s not shorts and jandles and it’s not suit and tie.  It’s the…..dum duh num dum……the inbetween.  Aggggggh (think 1950’s screen siren scream here).

Is anyone else like me and on their first day of school, a new job or a wedding and you absolutely have to purchase a new outfit?  Or is that just me?  Well, it is me, I have to own that.

So, I have a pair of Zara nautical styled (more on that style theme in another blog post soon) trousers I purchased in Sydney recently, that I haven’t worn.  I am having them taken up right now, cause I’d look like Groucho Marx if I didn’t.  But that’s as far as I’ve got.  Bugger.

I don’t want to go full nautical, corporate or too casual.  I am in a quandary.  My old clothes from corporate-ville are maybe a little too tired, but I only need a top,  now I have bottom half sorted.  So it’s a top, oh and some shoes.  I got my nails done last week by Pop Nails and they are fab-u-lous.  So that leaves me needing just a top and shoes, maybe some earrings.  Oh shit. Ok, breathe.

So, work with me sisters,  maybe I suck it up, wear a top I already have and then add some cool shoes.  Wanna know the shoes I’m trying to decide between?  You do? Ok, check these puppies out from Gorman and then these gorgeous ones from Kathryn Wilson.  Swoon much? But I can’t have both.  I have also been coveting these ones from Augustine, but they frustratingly sold out over the weekend.  I need to up my game, as I keep spying things I love and missing out by waiting too long.  Anyhoo, I digress.

What’s really exciting about starting a new job at this particular place and in an advertising and marketing environment means I can wear a T-shirt to work and it not be a major faux pas.  Call me crazy, but that is just beyond amazing.  I’m not talking simple T-Shirt and no bling.  I’m talking blinging that sucker out with a necklace and jacket and some mules and some other stuff and things, but just the mere thought of wearing the T-Shirt, with adornment, has got me all hot under the collar.  It probably means I should make more of an effort to find that elusive perfect white T  that I’ve been hunting for then shouldn’t I.

So wish me luck sisters, the ideas could all change tomorrow, but I reckon I am pretty darn excited for what I have in store for me in this new role.  I can’t wait to learn new stuff, meet new people and get some serious shit done.  I am chomping at the bit.  It’ll make for some exciting satorial adventures again too.

If you want to see the whole look come together, make sure you follow me on instagram @sisterhoodofstylenz and check out my Monday morning post.

And sisters, remember, if you need help styling YOUR first day of work at a new job, contact me today to book a styling session,  I would love to work wtih you.  Email me at emma@sisterhoodofstyle.com today.

Mmmmmwah, love EJ, the mother of the sisterhood of style xo

A chin-wag with the Sisterhood

Hey sister, so great seeing you here.  I love that you came to me, asking about my styling sessions.  I really value that you trust me to look after you.  We’re going to have so much fun uncovering your style.

Will I have to get my clothes off in front of you?

Babe, only if you feel comfortable.  I am no size 8 and know it can be embarrassing getting changed in front of others with your mum undies and bad bra on, or maybe you’ve got your sexy matching knicker set on, to make you feel outstanding. Either way, it’s up to you, but I reckon, you’ll get far more out of our session if you do get changed into the outfits we are styling.

Will you laugh at my clothes?

Honey would you laugh at my clothes?  No, there’s no way I’d do that.  This experience is special for you and you’re allowing me into your home, your sacred space and I’ll honour that.  With your permission I’m helping to find your style in your wardrobe and to get you to look at things anew. I want you to walk confidently into the world, head held high, styled in what you already own. If you see value in that, then you may like to book me to go shopping with you, but baby steps right? Let’s get your wardrobe sorted first.

What will you do though? How does this work?

I’ve loved putting outfits together since I was a little girl.  My love of style came from my gorgeous mum and grandmother. Firstly my grandmother.  She often wore a kilt with a  gorgeous brooch or pin. Her favourite colour was moss green and her jumper or cardigan always matched her skirt or kilt. My mum though, wow, just wow. She’s 70 now and rocks a fabulous personal style – all her own.  And that’s what I want to achieve for you.  Not being 70, but a confidence within you to style yourself daily. I suggest that you sort out your clothes that you want help with first, the clothes that you love or don’t know how to style. Or maybe the one trick pony that you brought on a whim and don’t know how to style it.  Then we’ll work on mixing and matching them with some sex, drugs and rock n roll, or you know, embellishments (like a scarf or necklace or a roll of the sleeve).  I’ll take photos of you in the outfits we style, so that you can access the pieces and looks we have created anytime.  At first you’re gonna feel awkward.  I can see it in my client’s faces, “jesus, what have I done, this woman is in my bedroom, going through my closet”. But quickly, I’ll  make you feel safe and secure. There’ll be banter, hard questions and some quick decisions. I will try to shake off some of the style shackles you’ve put yourself in and help you to embrace a whole new wardrobe.

But I don’t like what you wear!

That’s okay, I do. This is about you and what you wear that matters. I love how I look and what I wear and this is why I do this.  I want to share that joy with other women and make them feel more confident and crack open their own style game. ‘Cause you got this babe, you just forgot it was there or haven’t unlocked it yet.

What makes you think you can do this?

Well I know I have confidence in my style and I like what I put together. I’m training for a Diploma in Professional Styling, so I’ll have a piece of paper soon, if that floats your boat.  I’ve got a tonne of testimonials from happy clients.  I have an innate ability to put an outfit together and feel great in it and I have the ability to do it for others.  My mission is to help women find their confidence through style. I have achieved that with my clients already and I know I can do this for you. One client told me the experience was “life changing and everyone should have me in their closet”.  I want you to feel in control, with me riding shotgun, as your navigator.

Why do you do this?

Because it inspires me to help women. There are so many of us out there going about life just okay. One of the ways that can make a woman feel great is through her styling. This doesn’t mean dropping a wad cash, wearing designer clothes or being a snob. This means her dressing daily with purpose and attention. Attention on her. For her.  You don’t have to be getting accolades for your outfit (though, be honest, it’d kinda nice when you do), you just have to love what you have on and I guarantee you, like armour, it will help you face the day ahead.

Okay then, let’s get started, here’s my wardrobe…

Don’t be scared sisters, you are so bloody worth the effort.

Love EJ

Mother of the Sisterhood of Style x