Why you should agender-ise your sisterhood catch ups

I’m here to share with you why you should agender-ise your squad catch ups.  It’s a thing.  Well it wasn’t a thing, but now it is.

Sisters, time with your sisterhood, your besties, your squad is precious and often too short.  These precious moments are often so full of excitement at catching up, workshopping important and less important information and bantering back and forth, that you can leave feeling there was so much more to say.  Well I have a plan to help you on that.

Now, “just back the truck up” I hear you say, you want me to what?  Yes, I said it, I want you to put an agenda on the table and work through it systematically or erratically, whatever rocks your boat when you next meet up with your sisterhood/squad/friends/besties.  You’ll leave with a sense of calm that everyone has put their cards on the table and got their turn to offload/share/bitch/moan/vent/celebrate.

I’m finding the older I get (I still feel 27, but have a few more wrinkles, rolls and kids than I did back then), that time with my friends is sacred and I want to wring the most out of the time I have with them as possible.  There is so much that can’t be said via text and short phone calls, so I tend to “save” stuff up, but by the time we catch up, the moment’s been and gone, I’ve workshopped the issue myself or I’ve just plain forgotten.

And then in the space of one week, I was lucky enough to have two girly catch ups booked in and would you believe, both sets of friends put an agenda on the table.  At my heart, I’m an organiser, I do it for a living wrangling clients in my day job and make shit happen in my #mumboss biz, so you can imagine I was giddy with delight that agendas had been set.  Both were different versions but both have their merits, so it got me thinking that this blog is all about the sisterhood and I should share some life-hacks that I love with you.  So here’s how they went:

1. Agenda One: “Bring your top 3 to discuss, everything else is a free for all”.  This agenda had a fluidness to it, a liberal dose of letting the cards fall where they lay but it set an expectation that you’d get your turn, you have important things to discuss and it will happen, but shit might change and that’s cool.
2. Agenda Two: Rough agenda for Thursday: School fair,  renovation bitch and moan, husbands, kids, body yarns – what the fuck is happening to us?, building each other up – we are amazing after all and AOB (any other business).

To be fair, Agenda number two lingered on AOB for most of the night as there were some big fat rocks in there to jump over, but we got through the rest in a flash, because we remembered to keep referring back to the agenda.  Everyone left feeling lighter than when they walked in, having had the chance to offload.

Now before you get your knickers in a twist with me, thinking I am being some sort of lifestyle expert, I promise, I’m not, I just want to help the sisterhood out with a way to make life simpler, easier, more fun and calming.  Who doesn’t need that?

What do you think?  Let me know if you use the idea at your next sisterhood catchup.  It’s one big karmic cathartic love bomb of an idea.  Well I think so anyway 🙂  Happy life-hack.

Mmmmmwah, EJ, the mother of the sisterhood.  x0x0

 

The school mum catwalk in the age of the “super-mum”.

It’s a thing, I know it is, the school mum catwalk.  Well, it’s not really a thing but it is maybe kind of, a minor thing. Sort of, maybe a little bit. I dunno, but I get the feeling it is. Hear me out.

Mamma’s, put your hand up if you feel that pressure, that need to conform, out perform, do better, do more, say more, act smarter, be more, as a mamma at the school gate, on the sports ground, in the mall, at the cafe, at work, on your Instagram and Facebook feeds?  If you haven’t got your hand up, then big props to you, I love that you own your confidence and don’t bend to pressure.  But sometimes mammas, it’s hard right?

But I get that there is a need to please in mammas and we aren’t always kind to ourselves and sometimes, just a little bit, not kind to others. This blog started out being about what to wear on the school drop off.  It was a tongue in cheek look at the working mum and the SAHM (that’s stay at home mum) catwalk that presents itself every morning at my school. There isn’t really one, but it’s amusing to think there could be.  I’ve even had a few remarks on my strut into the school.  I swear I don’t strut, but there’s something about wearing heels that makes me “stride”, for sure. But I’m digressing.  I wanted to share my thoughts on why the motherhood sisterhood need to keep being awesome and working together, because the tribe of mothers I know are freaking awesome and beautiful and helpful and always ready to lend a hand.  Working/non working, it don’t matter.  There is no competition.  Except, I think maybe there is.

There is a competition within us and we only feel validated by hearing that others are in the same boat.  For me, well I constantly press like and share on the “scary mommy” posts I follow on Facebook.  I love Constance Hall and I dig a Kiwi writer call Emily Writes, because they all speak from the heart and talk of the ridiculousness and hardship and joy of motherhood.  I like that.  I like feel a part of a bigger community, that we are all in the trenches together and it sucks sometimes, it’s joyful more than sometimes and we’re in it for the long-haul.

It’s like when you have your first baby and you realise that you’ve just joined the biggest club in the world and the entry fee was a baby.  My world just opened up and aaaaaaalllll the mothering-ness came at me like a spider monkey.  My best friend and I laughingly started a cake competition on ourselves, without really knowing it, trying to out do our own cakes (not each others), year on year.  We lovingly supported each other at every party, with a “what a great cake” shout out as the candles got spat on, knowing we had been up until midnight the night before, icing and decorating that sucker, now that’s #solidarity.

But it’s like that with style and why I started Sisterhood.  I wanted to make other women feel as good about their own confidence in style as I did about the motherhood sisterhood that wrapped itself around me after the birth of the kids and when we joined the school community.

What I’m trying to say is, while there maybe a small faction of women that play in the muddy sandpit of spite, the sisterhood I am privileged to know, are freaking awesome women who lend a hand when needed and when it’s not asked for, get shit done and are completely awesome, they also rock a mean style game.  Whether that be in trainers and active wear or a kick arse power dress. Boom, mothers rock.

Have you got an awesome sisterhood of the motherhood story to share?  I’d love to hear it.

Mmmmwah, EJ, Mother Superior to the Sisterhood of Style xoxo

 

 

 

What she said. A client tells all…

Sisters, if you ever wanted to know what a shopping session with me was like, look no further.  My gorgeous client has written me the most incredible testimonial.  I reckon it’s that spot on, that full of emotion, that honest account of a shopping sesh with me and the precise embodiment of why I set up Sisterhood of Style, that I felt it was worthy of a blog post.

From Katie, Mother of 2, 40 years gorgeous:

I’ve been trying to come up with the best way to communicate my thoughts about how our shopping session went. I think the best thing to do is to write a blog post – but I don’t have a blog to post it to! But you do…

Sooooo, I just turned 40. And if that wasn’t enough to deal with, I have 2 young kids (aged 1 and 3). I work 4 days a week in a corporate job. I’m no longer a toned size 10 (understatement of the century). I haven’t bought clothes for myself for years – unless they are either pregnancy oriented or ill-fitting snap purchases from cheap online websites so I can kid myself that it doesn’t matter if they don’t fit. I don’t really know my size any more. I’m still wearing maternity bras even though I stopped breast feeding 6 months ago (we moved house – actually country – and I still haven’t unpacked everything properly). They are way to big and baggy on me – just one of many indicators of how little attention I’ve given my appearance recently. I haven’t lived in NZ for 13 years so I am out of touch with NZ fashion and high street shops. I have lost all interest in fashion because nothing ever fits me (5 years ago I was self proclaimed (!) reigning Queen of London high street shops). Somehow, I’ve managed to lose all confidence in my own ability to look and feel stylish. And, I don’t have the time (or confidence) to tackle the shops on my own, only to walk away with expensive clothes that don’t really fit me.

So, for my 40th birthday, I decided I needed some help to get me feeling good about clothes and my appearance again. This Mother of Style, was EXACTLY what I needed. In our 2 hours together we managed not only to find me quite a few great outfits that I feel good in, but a little bit of confidence in my body, and in my ability to shop was restored.

Thanks EJ for taking the time to think about my wants and needs and for getting to the bottom of what was holding me back. Thanks for running round after me while I tried on clothes that were the wrong size or not quite right for what ever reason. Thanks for your patience and understanding and helping me to understand why I was unsure about something. Rather than me losing confidence in my ability to shop, you re-affirmed my gut feel about an item, by articulating uncertainty I was feeling, embracing it when warranted or gently challenging me to be bold. Thanks for the compliments when we found something that looked and felt great.

Thanks for keeping me in budget! In our 2 hour session, even though I came away with quite a few bags of clothes I love, funnily enough, I left a bit of baggage behind! And, the maternity bras are gone… for good! Its onwards and upwards from here. 

xxx

Thank you so much Katies for sharing your story, it made my heart sing and I felt so happy for you that you found yourself a little bit through our session.  Love your work. Mmmmwah, EJ, the Mother of the Sisterhood xo

If you’d like to get in touch to book your own shopping session, drop me an email emma@sisterhoodofstyle.com or dm me on social media @sisterhoodofstylenz

What to wear on your first day of work

I’m starting a new job on Monday.  I’ll be the new kid on the block, at 42, that’s no mean feat.  I’ll be making friendly chit-chat and skulk out on my own at lunchtime.  I’ll have to ask where the loo is, how to make the coffee, what the kitchen etiquette is and how soon can I bring in my dog.  Yes sisters, you heard it here first, it’s a dog friendly workplace. Winning.

But I know that all of that will be a whisper in the wind by the end of the week, once I’ve worked with these awesome new people for a few days and I get the hang of the place.

What I am becoming super preoccupied with though, is what the hell do I wear?  It’s not a corporate, but I’ll be working with corporate clients, it’s not a big company, but I’ll be working with big companies.  It’s not shorts and jandles and it’s not suit and tie.  It’s the…..dum duh num dum……the inbetween.  Aggggggh (think 1950’s screen siren scream here).

Is anyone else like me and on their first day of school, a new job or a wedding and you absolutely have to purchase a new outfit?  Or is that just me?  Well, it is me, I have to own that.

So, I have a pair of Zara nautical styled (more on that style theme in another blog post soon) trousers I purchased in Sydney recently, that I haven’t worn.  I am having them taken up right now, cause I’d look like Groucho Marx if I didn’t.  But that’s as far as I’ve got.  Bugger.

I don’t want to go full nautical, corporate or too casual.  I am in a quandary.  My old clothes from corporate-ville are maybe a little too tired, but I only need a top,  now I have bottom half sorted.  So it’s a top, oh and some shoes.  I got my nails done last week by Pop Nails and they are fab-u-lous.  So that leaves me needing just a top and shoes, maybe some earrings.  Oh shit. Ok, breathe.

So, work with me sisters,  maybe I suck it up, wear a top I already have and then add some cool shoes.  Wanna know the shoes I’m trying to decide between?  You do? Ok, check these puppies out from Gorman and then these gorgeous ones from Kathryn Wilson.  Swoon much? But I can’t have both.  I have also been coveting these ones from Augustine, but they frustratingly sold out over the weekend.  I need to up my game, as I keep spying things I love and missing out by waiting too long.  Anyhoo, I digress.

What’s really exciting about starting a new job at this particular place and in an advertising and marketing environment means I can wear a T-shirt to work and it not be a major faux pas.  Call me crazy, but that is just beyond amazing.  I’m not talking simple T-Shirt and no bling.  I’m talking blinging that sucker out with a necklace and jacket and some mules and some other stuff and things, but just the mere thought of wearing the T-Shirt, with adornment, has got me all hot under the collar.  It probably means I should make more of an effort to find that elusive perfect white T  that I’ve been hunting for then shouldn’t I.

So wish me luck sisters, the ideas could all change tomorrow, but I reckon I am pretty darn excited for what I have in store for me in this new role.  I can’t wait to learn new stuff, meet new people and get some serious shit done.  I am chomping at the bit.  It’ll make for some exciting satorial adventures again too.

If you want to see the whole look come together, make sure you follow me on instagram @sisterhoodofstylenz and check out my Monday morning post.

And sisters, remember, if you need help styling YOUR first day of work at a new job, contact me today to book a styling session,  I would love to work wtih you.  Email me at emma@sisterhoodofstyle.com today.

Mmmmmwah, love EJ, the mother of the sisterhood of style xo

How to feel like Beyonce, every goddamn day

Hands up who wants to feel like Beyoncé, every goddamn day.  (imagine the hands up emoji here). I know I do.  So I will. I decided I would.  No one else, just me.  She’s fierce, fabulous and rocks her own style like no other.  You see, there’s no better magic than the magic in you sisters ,and I reckon you have it in you to bring it out and hear it roar.

My musings today started off being about accessorising, but when I thought more on this and started writing, I realised I just want you to feel less overwhelmed at the thought of “being stylish”.  I overheard another sister talking to a friend the other day saying that it was easier to wear stretchy pants and a sweatshirt, then it was to put on a great outfit.  I had to hold my tongue at that, but what I should have said is that it’s no harder putting on an outfit with some style involved, for instance, a skirt, a good fitting T-shirt and a necklace or scarf with a pair of white trainers (they don’t have to be high-end) that it is to put on a pair of black stretchy trackies or yoga pants, a top and a zip hoody.  Is it?

Well, if you still think that’s a tough one, here’s  3 easy steps to try and shake you out of your yoga pant groove and into a “Beyoncé state of mind”.  These can all be achieved without spending a single cent.

Add an accessory – try adding a colourful scarf, or a chunky necklace.  You could add some colourful earrings or a snazzy belt.  Own that snaz.  This is a quick way to jazz (and snaz) up an outfit with relatively little effort.  Now I challenge you to go into your deepest darkest parts of your drawers and wardrobes and dig out that accessory that you’ve stuck at the bottom of the pile.  Now put it on and own that sucker!

Wear your hair differently – try it and you will notice a difference.  Admittedly, this may be easier for those sisters with long hair, but you can always give it a go, even with a short style.  You could add a temporary colour if you have shorter hair, or try brushing your hair with a different parting, flipping it from the root to the other side, to add volume, like Riawna Capri does.  If you have long hair, try a fringe (I got one last week and it’s a keeper) or for something less permanent, you could a fierce do (Beyoncé styles) or a top-knot.  The trick with the top-knot is to not try too hard, make it effortless by pulling and brushing all your hair up onto the crown of your head, wrap and bend into a band and fasten with bobby pins.  Trying new options for your hair is often the number one way to rock your style, without spending a lot.

Challenge yourself – next time you reach for your stretchy black yoga pants and sweatshirts, take one of them off and add something with a bit more style (and it will look like you made just that little bit of extra effort).  If it’s the pants you take off, add jeans or a skirt, style it for relaxed look with trainers and the sweatshirt, do your hair and add a bit of lip gloss.  Just bring yourself up, one notch on the style ladder and by simply giving yourself the time and owning your own confidence, you will start to feel that little bit “more” for yourself.

Before you go, I wanted to share this.  I  know that you are likely feeling the pressure from society, from social media, friend and family  to “like” certain looks, but don’t forget to listen to your own inner voice telling you, knowing you and trusting you to like what you like. Your style journey is unique to you, whether it be wanting to gain more confidence in style after losing weight/having a baby, losing your boobs to a mastectomy or breastfeeding, or having lost yourself through a huge career or raising young children.  But I know you want to feel confident, so badly. And you want to find your style in order to help yourself shine.  You want to feel fantastic, mysterious, fun, causal at the right time and smoking hot the next. You don’t want to feel confused or embarrassed by your wardrobe.  So sisters, be like Beyoncé, every single day, feel like a a queen. Allow yourself the pleasure of feeling great about yourself everyday. If you need some extra encouragement, repeat after me WWBD?  (What would Beyoncé do?).

Mmmmwah, love EJ, the Queen of the Sisterhood of Style

Come hang out with me on Instagram @sisterhoodofstylenz

xo

 

 

 

What NOT to wear to a beauty pageant.

And the winner is….the crown, it was always about the crown. Ohhh and the sash, the sash was lovely and when I received one on my hen do, it made me feel all tingly inside, even though it said Bride to Be and not WINNER, MISS WORLD.

I always loved watching beauty pageants as a little girl.  And now, well now, I get to attend one, like my seven-year old says “in really true life”, see it live, maybe even trip backstage, and maybe, just maybe, touch that crown (is there a crown?) and covet that sash.  Miss Auckland, here I come.

As a wee girl I LOVED watching Lorraine Downes win Miss Universe back in 1983. She was the golden New Zealand Princess and I wanted to be her. It was one of the most exciting things I had ever seen, aside from when Princess Di married Prince Charles. The dresses, the posing, the outfits, the sparkly things and that farking crown; it was enormous and awesome and I wanted one. From there I watched every Miss Universe and Miss World (to be fair I didn’t know there was a difference at that time) that I could get my hands on and then moved onto the Benson & Hedges (icky cigarette sponsorship aside) Fashion Design Awards in the late 80’s. So you get the picture, I liked pageants  things a lot.  And to be honest, the love has never really died.

Then one of my many step-brothers just goes and gets his own “really true life” beauty queen and kick arse producer of awesome and she is pageant Director of Miss Auckland. The really cool thing about Miss Auckland is that the pageant motto is “beauty with purpose”, gotta love that.

So this weekend, we are going along as a family to hoot, holler and show our support.  I, of course, will be eyes on stalks and trying to get my hands on the crown (just for research purposes of course).

Cut to what to wear. I am in a total quandary as to what to wear. This Queen is confused. I’m not usually confused for sartorial options, but this is hard. There are so many faux pas to potentially make, so many ways I could cock this up. So, instead of compiling a list of what to wear, I’ve compiled a list of what not to wear.

1. SWIMSUIT This was easy, I mean, no, just no.

2. SEQUINS In my head, even if they don’t wear them, I imagine the night to be awash in sequins.  Do I dare try and compete?  I have a cool paid of Sass and Bide sequinned trousers, but I suspect I should be leaving them well alone.

3. ALL BLACK This look is probably best left for fashion week, rather than Miss Auckland

4. TWIN SET AND PEARLS I’m not a Dance Mom, so let’s not go there, even though I’m probably old enough to be one of the finalists big sisters; well alright, young aunt.  No?  OK, stop, (whisper) mother. So the Twin Set and pearls can shove it.

5. ACTIVE WEAR that would just be silly or psychotic.

6. A CROWN I so want to, but no, no, no.

So what will I wear to the ball?  Well I will either spend the next 24 hours obsessing over this or, choose in haste after a day in the garden with my boys, run inside, put my hair in a do and pull it together.  I suspect leopard print and a kaftan will be involved.  Watch this space sisters.

So in the meantime, I’ll leave you with this to ponder; the question asked of Gloria Diaz of Philippines in 1969 Miss Universe “in the next day or so, a man will land on the moon.  If a man from the moon landed in your hometown, what would you do to entertain him?”

See you later you gorgeous beautiful queens.

mmmmmwah, love  EJ, the mother of the sisterhood. xxxx

My top three style secrets

Let’s hear if for the girls, let’s give the girl a hand. Sometimes she don’t talk sweet, but I don’t really mind.  I know some may say I swear like a potty mouthed trooper but I’m 42 so I think I earned my stripes. And (I’m gonna swear now)……..I just want to say thank fuck for you.

I’m celebrating the sisterhood today sisters, all of you and then some.  You’re a fabulous bunch of style mavens, queens, mothers, non-mothers, brilliant, kick-ass sisters.  I felt you deserved some celebration.

When I set my first style challenge on Instagram this week, I didn’t realise the bond it would create with strangers.  I have been so awed and impressed at everyone that has played along, messaged me personally, posted their pics on Instagram, shared their style creations and played along  with their sisters on the other side of the world.  It brought tears to my eyes and told me, I’m on the right track, the Sisterhood of Style is here for the right reasons.

So I thought I’d say thanks to the sisterhood and share my top 3 style secrets and how you can achieve your own Sisterhood of Style.

Make yourself count.  You are awesome – everyday, in every way, you get better and better.  I think that was in a children’s book I read once, or maybe it’s reminiscent of Judy Bloom’s “Are you there God it’s me Margaret”. I think I’m digressing.  As we age, we go through so many facsimiles of ourselves, we morph and we change like we do our underpants, but one thing I know to be true – once I hit 40, I felt more myself than ever before and that feeling gets stronger and stronger. So celebrate your age, your style, how you feel about yourself.  Don’t be beholden to who or what you think you should be.  Remember self doubt is a total dick. Let go of any hangups and just be you, you are plenty. To add to how you feel about yourself, make sure you present yourself in the very best way.  Your style says a lot about who you are and what you think about yourself, so make it count.

Break out of your comfort zone.  Try pushing yourself to try something new.  It doesn’t have to be a big something, it just has to be something.  Move forward.  From what I’ve seen with my Sisterhood of Style challenge and those using #sisterhoodofstyle this week on Instagram, there was a whole lot of trying new and pushing out of comfort zones.  It’s a marvellous thing. Keep going.

Show your own style. Consider your body shape, your attributes you want to accentuate, the things you love.  Is it your eyes, your rocking hips, your fabulous legs, your insanely amazing boobs, your defined waist, your gorgeous feet?  Hold that thought. Then consider what colours affect you, what colours make you happy and makes your eyes shine.  Buy those colours, accentuate those features that you love and don’t be afraid to have a signature style.  Mine is eclectic-bohemian with a dash of corporate funk. I made that up. And so fucking what, I don’t want to conform, I just want to be me and to be kind.  Not sure what that means? Well I love leopard print, stripes, maxi skirts and dresses, fitted but not tight pencil skirts, structured jackets, denim, printed trousers and bright colours and I do it with a smile on my face. I also like embellishment.  In fact, embellishment is the QUEEN of everything to me.  I am officially a magpie I’m that attracted to baubles and shiny things, feathers and accoutrement. So that’s mine, what’s yours? Take some time to hone it and own that sisters, it’s uniquely yours.

Love you all, this Sister is one happy mother of the Sisterhood of Style this week. Remember, if you need help in showing your style, then let’s talk, I can help.  Email me at emma@sisterhoodofstyle.com for a chat.

The challenge this week and some of the things I wore.  Head on over to @sisterhoodofstyle #sisterhoodofstyle to see more.

 

Hi, my name is Emma and I don’t like small talk.

I popped my cherry for the Sisterhood last night.

Get your mind out of the gutters sisters from other misters,  I popped my biz networking cherry to be exact. Part of starting your own business is about networking, meeting new people, influencing others on your business and trying to figure out how to make sense of this crazy thing called entrepreneurship.  I was bricking myself. I even shot to the toilet as I arrived to calm my nerves. I gave myself a stern talking too and got my big girl panties on and headed out into the unknown and into a sea of chattering networking women biz owners.

For those that know me, I don’t have a problem with talking to people.  I was known as gabby-jaws by my pseudo godfather (my real godfather was an absentee reverend who fell off the wagon) but I digress. In fact I freaking love talking to people.  I love people, I love what they have to say, I try to be curious about them and I generally walk into parties feeling very confident in myself, knowing I won’t have a problem finding someone to talk to.  This is because a party is likely to be for someone I know, a friend.  I have connections with those friends, they know me, know I am no wallflower, know I love a wine or three like to spin a good yarn. We cut through the small talk years ago, we just shoot the shit, straight from the start of the night.

But networking, that’s different, that’s hard that requires small talk and me explaining what I do.  That makes my tummy do flip-flops and my teeth freeze in my mouth, with a demented smile plastered to my face.

Even though I’ve worked for years where networking was an important part of what we do, this was different, I was flying solo.  You see what I did there, I said “we”. Because 100% of the time that I have ever networked, it’s been about what we do, about a business I work for, a project I am working on.  This time was hugely different, it was about Sisterhood of Style and no one else can talk about it like I can – and that’s so scary I felt a little bit sicky uppy.

But you know what sisters, as soon as I grabbed my drink (non-alcoholic) a gorgeous sister come straight up to me and introduce herself – thank you Fiona Hall.  She had recognised me from Facebook and Instagram and immediately put me at ease.  Then I felt my nerves slide slowly away and anyone I mentioned my nerves too, they all nodded in agreement with me, imparting their own cherry popping moment for networking or how they like to handle it.  One very sisterhood-loving difference about a women’s networking event – you hug hello – heart to heart.  That’s fucking cool. You don’t get that at a male dominated network night.

So I thought some of you sisters may be feeling the same way about networking and I could help with some tips I learnt tonight. I’ve also included some gems that I learnt from the speakers, who were kick-arse awesome and who each spoke on purpose and perseverance, timely given I was struggling to persevere with networking.

This story has a good ending, a great ending.  I sucked up my scardy-cat and gave myself a good talking too.  I mixed and mingled and started to hand out my newly minted business cards.  Women asked me what I did, we hugged, we were introduced to new people, we laughed, we agreed to meet up and possibly even collaborate (that got my creative juices flowing) and I left at 11pm freaking happy, so buzzed I couldn’t sleep, so I sat up and wrote this.  I hope your next networking is as successful, try my tips & tricks below to help you. If you’ve got any advice on networking, the sisterhood would love to hear it, please share.

SISTERHOOD OF STYLE NETWORKING CHERRY POPPING TIPS

Tip 1: Don’t drink.  Despite loving seeing a glass of wine waiting for me at an event, I appreciated that I didn’t drink. A large group of women in a room have a an incredible energy (and noise) and don’t need alcohol (sometimes we do) to fuel it.  Without the booze (it was a dry event) I had no dutch courage, I just had me and that ended up being ok.

Tip 2: Force yourself, whatever you do, to introduce yourself to someone you don’t know.   I was a bit giddy to meet a lot of women I’ve only known via social media and coaching groups I am in.  So to meet them in person, to realise that some of them knew of Sisterhood of Style, was incredible and mind-blowing and just bloody awesome.  But I wouldn’t have found that out, unless I had forced myself to be brave in the first place and buy a ticket to the event and then say hello to strangers.

Tip 3: I can’t let a tip and trick slip by without sharing my style advice.  Wear something that makes you feel fantastic.  Don’t wear anything that you need to pull, push or alter during the evening.  Wear colour.  Stand out if you can.  Women appreciate good style, they know when they see it.  You are in a room of like-minded business women, all putting their best selves forward, you should too.  Wear something that someone will comment on – its a great icebreaker.  I fell in love with a million pairs of shoes at the event and spoke to the women wearing them, telling them so.

Snippets of kick-arse awesome advice from the speakers:

JFDI – Just fucking do it – Belinda Tuki from Honest Food Company

Shed your shit and shine – Dr Martha Nessler

Life is about stepping stones and stopping points – Dr Martha Nessler

Set a bold money goal – Catherine Newton 

You can’t unlearn that – Amanda Betts from Bridge the Gap 

I don’t want to be famous, I want to change the world  – Natalie Cutler Welsh from Go to Girl NZ and the event host

Mmmmmmwah,

EJ  xx  The mother of the Sisterhood.

 

This is the outfit I wore to the event.  

 

Dress up for date night – for yourself

Date night.  It’s an American concept that has filtered through marriages & love matches around the world.  I was a long time listener but first time caller once I became a parent.  But date night doesn’t apply to just parents, no way sister.  The concept is for couples to take the time out and celebrate being a couple.

Huffington post tells us that date night is important because it allows time for romance, fun and commitment (which is kinda important in a love match isn’t it).

Auckland’s Heart of the City want us to have date nights, so we can check out their awesome love bite suggestions 

But for me, Date Night allowed/s me the chance to get out of the house, without cereal and a small human attached to me.  It was also a chance to shine in an outfit.

Since then, I’ve realised I am worth more than just waiting for date night so that I can shine everyday, in all my outfits, but back then, not so much, it was baby-steps.  So my point is, yes date night is important for you as a couple, but it’s equally as important for you, simply you, gorgeous, wonderful, amazing you.  Dress for him, or her, but dress, most importantly for yourself.

The power of a great outfit will anchor you.  You may be feeling less than your best but an outfit can help transform you into the most awesome version of you.  It will coax your inner awesome out and give you the boost you need to get yourself out of the house, especially if you are a new mum or coming back to yourself from a low point.

So get amongst it sisters, celebrate yourself and your beau and dress up or dress down, but make the outfit count.

Want some inspo for date night outfits?  Here’s a couple I prepared earlier…just add some accessories and lippy and you got yourself a date.

Movies and a Burger

Walk in the Park (technically date day)

Glam drinks

Stay at home date 

And remember, coming home from your date night by half past eight is perfectly acceptable – just continue the date in your slippers and PJ’s!  🙂

Date night before 6pm and after 8.30pm….

Date night 6pm

Date night 9pm

 

I’ll leave you with this…..Coco Chanel has a quote attributed to her that sums it up beautifully. “Beauty begins, the moment you decide to be yourself”.

mmmmmwah,

love EJ 

Sisterhood of style x

What are you waiting for? – JFDI

Before you ask, no, I didn’t spell Jedi wrong in the title.  It’s an an acronym, a shortening of a phrase.  I don’t usually like them, as it implies that you should already know, that you aren’t on the in.  But I have a good reason – it’s not approps to write it out in the title cause it has a sweary word in it.

Ok now you’re intrigued – alright, I hear you, here it is, in case you didn’t know,  JFDI means JUST FUCKING DO IT.  There, it’s out, sorry mum.

Ok, so what do I want you to just flipping do?  Wear it.  Wear all of it.

What the heck am I talking about?  Well, for me, it all started after I had my kiddletts.  I hung around a lot dressed in what is now known as “active wear” but ten years ago, it was just called trackies and a tshirt with your runners.  I looked a bit bland and a whole lot non-descript and nothing like me.  Not who I wanted to portray to the world or who I felt I was on the inside.

Fast forward 10 years, and wouldn’t you know it, I have a nearly ten year old and I’m wearing some mighty bling on my neck, a bright red lippy and (intentionally styled) hair as wild as the gorse bush I sat on last week at a park.  But I digress.

I recently held a style workshop for a bunch of awesome sisters and one of my guests told me that she was keeping items locked off from everyday wear as she thought them too fancy.  I said, fancy schmancy, get them on and JFDI.  Well I didn’t say that, but I thought it and then we talked about how to style them up for everyday, take them from day to night and she left, hopefully back to her wardrobe to try the new ideas on for size.

So, I’m here to call out your inner goddess, yes I know that she’s in there, that one that dreams of lippy and a great outfit that you feel fab in.  You know it’s hidden in your wardrobe, I can almost sense it myself.  So go, go get her out, try her on and take her for a spin.

Please stop waiting for the fancy event, the black tie event, the wedding, the meeting, the dinner, the party, the girls lunch – JFDI and put it on now.  Even if your kids are at home sick, you are working from home or your work is quite corporate, JFDI.  You will know the right thing to wear at the appropriate time, but stop holding back your fun things for just fun things.  Get joy, spark the joy in you, from those items – all the time.  There’s a thought.

I don’t wait around anymore for that ‘fancy special event’ I tailor my looks according to what I am doing that day, but I don’t hold items back for special special anymore.  Anything goes, even the sequin pant on the school run – whose gonna stop me? Certainly not the fashion police and what’s the worse they can say to me ” you look overdressed” or “you look nice”?  Yes, well thanks, I do.

So Sisters, go try on that jacket, skirt, trouser, top, necklace or lippy that you have reserved in your head, get it on and JFDI.

Let me know how  your JFDI outfit goes.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmwah

EJ x